Men have been warned against taking responsibility for every woman’s financial problems, with a counsellor saying the habit is leaving many struggling financially while sacrificing their own future.
Zambian-based trainer and counsellor Emmanuel Mukula says many men would be in a better financial position today if they exercised discipline in how they spend money on women.
Mukula says some men have turned their salaries into emergency funds for women, paying bills and meeting demands even when their own finances are falling apart.
According to him, some men are struggling not because they earn too little, but because they have taken responsibility for financial problems that are not theirs to solve.
“You are paying rent, buying groceries, settling debts, sending money for emergencies, financing lifestyles and meeting demands that are completely beyond your financial capacity. Meanwhile, your own life is going nowhere,” he said.
He cautioned men against trying to become financial heroes while neglecting their own needs and long-term plans.
“Stop trying to be a financial hero when your own life is falling apart. You cannot be everyone’s provider when you have nothing meaningful to show for your own hard work. Sort out your finances first,” he said.
Mukula stressed that being in a relationship does not automatically make every woman’s financial problem a man’s responsibility, urging men to distinguish between genuine support and financial exploitation.
“Learn the difference between helping someone and being financially exploited,” he said.
He also challenged men who spend beyond their means to prove their masculinity, arguing that genuine affection should not depend on how much money a man spends.
“Your value as a man is not determined by how many bills you pay,” he said.
Mukula further observed that some men are financing women’s lifestyles at the expense of their own financial security, leaving themselves without savings, investments, property or a clear financial plan.
He urged men to protect their earnings and prioritise their ambitions instead of feeling pressured to explain why they cannot meet every financial demand.
“You don’t have to explain your financial position every time someone asks you for money. You worked for it. You have responsibilities. You have dreams. You have a future to secure,” he said.
He added that money spent trying to impress people could instead be invested in businesses, houses, education or other ventures capable of generating income.
Mukula said men could remain loving, supportive and generous without becoming financially irresponsible, warning that spending beyond one’s means could have lasting consequences.
“Nobody is coming to refund you the money you wasted trying to impress people. Nobody is going to give you back the years you spent neglecting your financial future,” he said.
His remarks come amid growing concerns about financial pressures and the desperate decisions some people make when struggling to meet their financial needs, although financial difficulties should not be used to justify unlawful or harmful conduct.
Zambian-based trainer and counsellor Emmanuel Mukula says many men would be in a better financial position today if they exercised discipline in how they spend money on women.
Mukula says some men have turned their salaries into emergency funds for women, paying bills and meeting demands even when their own finances are falling apart.
According to him, some men are struggling not because they earn too little, but because they have taken responsibility for financial problems that are not theirs to solve.
“You are paying rent, buying groceries, settling debts, sending money for emergencies, financing lifestyles and meeting demands that are completely beyond your financial capacity. Meanwhile, your own life is going nowhere,” he said.
He cautioned men against trying to become financial heroes while neglecting their own needs and long-term plans.
“Stop trying to be a financial hero when your own life is falling apart. You cannot be everyone’s provider when you have nothing meaningful to show for your own hard work. Sort out your finances first,” he said.
Mukula stressed that being in a relationship does not automatically make every woman’s financial problem a man’s responsibility, urging men to distinguish between genuine support and financial exploitation.
“Learn the difference between helping someone and being financially exploited,” he said.
He also challenged men who spend beyond their means to prove their masculinity, arguing that genuine affection should not depend on how much money a man spends.
“Your value as a man is not determined by how many bills you pay,” he said.
Mukula further observed that some men are financing women’s lifestyles at the expense of their own financial security, leaving themselves without savings, investments, property or a clear financial plan.
He urged men to protect their earnings and prioritise their ambitions instead of feeling pressured to explain why they cannot meet every financial demand.
“You don’t have to explain your financial position every time someone asks you for money. You worked for it. You have responsibilities. You have dreams. You have a future to secure,” he said.
He added that money spent trying to impress people could instead be invested in businesses, houses, education or other ventures capable of generating income.
Mukula said men could remain loving, supportive and generous without becoming financially irresponsible, warning that spending beyond one’s means could have lasting consequences.
“Nobody is coming to refund you the money you wasted trying to impress people. Nobody is going to give you back the years you spent neglecting your financial future,” he said.
His remarks come amid growing concerns about financial pressures and the desperate decisions some people make when struggling to meet their financial needs, although financial difficulties should not be used to justify unlawful or harmful conduct.
