Men who go to South Africa don’t support us – say abandoned women

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Malawians are among over 31 000 travellers are passing through the Beitbridge border post daily. (Infor+Image credit to www.arrivealive.co.za)

As young and energetic Malawians continue leaving the country for South Africa to look for greener pastures, Malawi24 has established that wives of such men in Nkhotakota suffer due to lack of financial support.

When such women have been left behind, they lack financial support from their husbands which force them to either divorce the men or engage in immoral acts to earn a living.

Malawi24 caught up with one woman whose husband left the country for South Africa in 2010.

According to Nabanda*, her husband left his home in Traditional Authority Malengachanzi in Nkhotakota with the aim of improving the welfare of his families because the man had two wives.

“The man used to help us during the first years but he just changed from nowhere and basic needs became scarce to us,” Nabanda said.

Malawians are dying while crossing into South Africa

She proceeded to say that the man even stopped calling the two women and that is when they realised that he had forgotten them.

“We asked elders on what we can do several times but we failed to adapt because we were lacking basic needs that made us divorce the marriages. We left his home and we are in our respective homes,” she said.

Another woman from the same district told Malawi24 that her former husband left for South Africa in 2014 but he never sent her any support.

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“I chose to leave him and I have since married another man in the same village. I did this to have someone to be supporting me because I used to be having several partners to earn a living,” the woman said.

These are just few women in Nkhotakota who are suffering because their men left for South Africa looking for money.

Commenting on such issues, one of the Malawian men who is in South Africa said sometimes this happens because of the little salary that they receive.

He said that the desire to help may be there but looking at the amount of money they use for rentals, transport and other expenses in South Africa, it becomes challenging.

*Name has been changed

 

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151 Comments

  1. How can they support their wives when they can not support themselves. Kkkk I feel really bad for the people who goes to RSA to search for greener pastures when we have the much greener ones here in Nyasaland

  2. Kkkkk those guys who push themselves to that panic country in the name of searching for green pastures and saying here they were suffered or they were on financial crisis they are totally laying because they can’t wait for the government to hand money in there pockets without doing anything, if they say here in Malawi we have a problem of jobless why can’t they start business with the money they used to purchase passport and transport to South Africa? They must be mindful.The Bible said no food to a person, who is just rest,in other words I can say no food to lazy man

    • If you benefit from zipani my friend keep that to yourself. Do you have an idea that without people coming to RSA they will be no foreign currency. Even you president he was in exile because of green pastures. He just came to be president then after that he will go back. So think before you speak

    • i think u dnt understand what he [makuluni] trying to say ‘ndalama yomwe mumkapangisila passport mukanatha kuyambila bzness kumalawi komkuno zithu bwezi zkukuendelaniso

    • Tonse tili ku R.S.A. tiyambe bznes? Kkkk koma guyz nde azigula ndan? In other way sitonse amene timatha bzns komanso olo utapanga bzns-yo ku Malawi udzingolira daily quite. Anzerunu zipangan ine myaz

  3. It all depends how much you think about your wife and kids as for me there is no one who can make me forget my lovely wife and kids I stay in RSA but each and every year I go home and visit them each month I send them something because it took both me and my wife to plan for this trip so why dump her. The beginning of wisdom is the fear of God.

  4. That’s why wanga Ali nane pafupi. Ngati ndiuhule ahule pamaso anga. In South Africa they are girls that can make you forget your wife home. So to avoid that call her immediately you get a job. Nanunso akazi akuMalawi if your husband send money don’t waste it like money grows in tree. Anthu akupanga economic kuno kuganizira inuyo kumudzi.

  5. This is very true and sad, in fact it is not only women in nkhota kota, the trend is the same in many parts of the country. . . Some of such men end up marrying there abandoning their wives completely. Why marrying in the first place? ??

  6. Its true with what women said, to the other hand i could say, in SA life is not easy as at home (MALAWI) . Everything is money life becomes worse if you earn less a 1500 rands. But if married people dont support thier families , they is this what i see in South Afeica

    1. Most Malawiam of 65% are married with SA women
    2. About 23% have more than 1 sex partner where they expend more to them than home (MALAWI).
    3. Lack of staible job, many they work under wages, earning less 80 rand a day which is so bad life.

    Living in SA is being strong and brave in mind.

  7. I would like to encourage young girls to don’t rush into getting married thinking that a husband is going be there to provide everything you. Learn to be self independence.

  8. Kikiki tryna found out may be got stolen.or else they are at maternity leave at LINDELA.Apo biii zeno yinayendapo.guys tryna support home plz….

  9. and this is laughable …ndathandize kuganiza to be be honesty anthuwa kunoko amakhala ali aphawi nde akavaya theba sangakumbukile kuti ali ndi mkazi the reason is more women sadzisamalira they are not sexual attractive. so we men be honesty . komaso be serious do something that can help yourself like muzilimbika geri ..kaya ti ma business than waiting for anyamatawa muzingokhaula..

  10. wachamba ndi mamuna wakeyo ine ndilibe mkazi koma ndimasala abale anga bwanji ndinali ku south afrika komko now ndili ku zambia koma anthu ku malawi kumwa tea chimodzi. Modzi umakhala umunthu obadwa nawo ngati unabadwa chitsilu or uwoloke border ndiwe chisiru basi

  11. kmanso azikaziwo asamangodalila amunawo ayi moyo umenewo unatha zinali zakale,akhonza kumapanga tima business tinkono tinkono,osamangokhala azimai aulesi majalende ayiiiiii

  12. in Malawi poverty at its highest level,woman in Malawi are good at complaining and not finding solutions …..how can you live without basic needs ..groceries and clothes no job in your country …..your leaders are there just to enrich themselves not creating jobs for your husband

  13. Ndi zoona mabanja ambiri anasokonekera kamba koti amuna anapita kukafuna nsipu obiliwira. Ena samathandiza kamba kokomedwa ena ndikamba kakuvuta kwazinthu. Koma sionse omwe samakumbukira mabanja awo. Zimangotengera munthuyo. Komaso akazi ena ndi agalu olo kuwathandizani motani amangopezerapo mwayi osayamika kenako ndikungoyamba kuwavulira amuna ena makwalalamu.

  14. sometimes problem are the wives cuz of their behavious of slepping with some men while their husband are sufferling in exile 4 them to live better lyf.if it is such case how can u help them????

    • Thats a lame excuse, anyway when you leave your wives here for five years without coming once, stuff like that are bound to happen.

  15. And I think this is all happening because we women we think we can nt make it without a man in our lyf,we feel we can’t survive we need. Men by this should b a lesson to all young ladies out there its tym women we should Stand on our own 2 fit and start depending on our self’, we can make it,isay we can survive.

  16. Yes, I would encourage people in Malawi NOT to move to South Africa. You think that you will get loads of money in Sodom and Gomorrah, but you won’t. SA companies often won’t hire foreigners, but those (more informal ones) who do will pay you less than the locals. Maybe K110,000 a month sounds great to you, but it is literally nothing in South Africa, after transport and food that’s all gone. You’ll live in a shack in the slums made from corrugated iron and cardboard that makes Chinsapo 2 look like Hollywood, and the locals will HATE you because “you are taking their job” (because they are too lazy to work). You won’t be able to send money back to family in Malawi and yes, your family will fall apart. It is really not worth it… plus, most South Africans would leave South Africa if given a chance, it is a living hell over here. The economy is busy crashing, the big foreign companies are leaving. Plus its terrorist government openly hates God and it’s really, really evil in SA. Don’t do it, just because you have poverty doesn’t mean you have nothing – you have far more than people in SA who have more money and possessions but a bad/evil life.

  17. Mukuchita bwino,guyz azikazanuwa ife tikuagwira ntchito kuno, nkhani ndi mankhwala olera bax pano akumangofuna yasopo, yandiwo,mchere ndikuchigayo sinanga chaka chino m’mere ndi mbwee!

  18. south Africa did not ban malawian ladies to go there just go there also
    akut kumazizila koma umasweta ukayamba kugwla ntchto ndeno wina wake nkuzaimba fon ndufuna fasausande ganja bas

  19. Ngakhale ochokera pa Chikwawa or Dowa ulendo pa BT or Pa LL ngati ulibe chikondi mkazi wako umayiwalako sizitengera kuti uli Ku Joni or Tanzania, mwitatu admn iwe mlongo wako watayidwa ndiye wangoganiza zonyezera wina aliyetse,

    • Wat do u mean dat i want gvernment to feed all families?.Hw many ppl wrking in Malawi?.Yes those ppl is nt dng wrng by running away bcz the1 who go to SouthAfrica they dnt hv something to do so dat they can gt money.So stop nonsense to those ppl.If u gt something to do here in Malawi,Do it nt blame those ppl.4m nw tll ur gverment dat: Those ppl cnt stop to lv this country unless our gverment change n gv those ppl something to do.STOP NONSENSE.

    • Taganizani anthu kumavutika ndi njala koma nduna yomwe ili mu undunawo kumapezeka ndindalama zankhani nkhani mnyumba komanso boma osachitapo kanthu.